At some point amongst the installers at Custom Theater my name has become a verb. And not in a cool, “I get my thing in action (VERB!) That’s what’s happenin’!” kind of way. But more in a downhearted, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again. I mean...damn!” kind of way. I thought I would explain the etymology of this new word.

John’d [Jond]

--verb

1. To be sent on a project, usually late in the day, most typically on a Friday. At first blush the job sounds like it should be simple – change one button on the programming, check why there is no picture on the Blu-ray, activate a light switch – but in reality, the job turns out to be much more complicated than imagined and the employee is required to work hours later than normal.

2. To be asked for “just one more thing” as you are about to punch out for the day.

3. To be told that it looks like it will be a short day. To make plans for doing things when you get off early. But to then have multiple additional service calls added throughout the day – each one at a time, so you think that there is still a chance of getting off early – until it becomes a long – LONG – day.

Use “John’d” in a sentence:

1.   “Dude! I totally got John’d! He had me go to a lighting service call at 3 PM on Friday and I didn’t get back until almost 8!”

2.   “It’s Friday and I just got a text message from John so I’m already totally expecting to get John’d today!”

Origin: 2005-2010 Custom Theater and Audio employee staff; from the Latin Johndicare, or “to be John’d.”

Conjugations:

I was John’d.

You (familiar) were John’d.

He, she or it was John’ded.

We were John’damosed.

They got John’dized.

Synonyms

1. Boned, Screwed, Tricked, Defeated, Pwned

Possible Solutions:

1. Punching out the very SECOND that John says, “OK. That’s it for the day. You can go.” Run, don’t walk, to the time clock, punch out, sprint out to your car, turn off your phone and drive away. Have the willpower to know that anything you've left behind is now dead to you and can't possibly be retrieved until the next work day. Or, come back and chance a Johning of epic proportions.

2. After you punch out, leave. Hanging around – even when OFF the clock – is a principal way in which one can be John’d.

3. Don’t make any plans for Friday night. For some unknown reason, Friday afternoons are particularly prone to Johndicare related events.